Fix YouJoker lovefanfiction
by Ocean Eyed Redhead
Summary: When Jane and her fellow psychiatry students sit in on a session with the Joker, she is singled out and asked to be his shrink for a week. No this is NOT all about Harleen.


Chapter Numero Uno

Hello Beautiful

The sixteen 25 year old psychiatry students at Gotham University stood patiently awaiting the next patient to enter. They had all congregated at Arkham for a field-trip. Here, they would watch Doctor Arkham and other psychiatrists work with the criminally insane.

They had just witnessed their last patient with Doctor Arkham, which was the former Doctor, Jonathan Crane. He still wanted to be called Doctor and when questions were allowed, Ben Vincent had made the mistake of calling him Mr. Crane. Jonathan then proceeded to make a long speech on why he was still Doctor Crane.

Now we waited on Doctor Harleen Quinzel. The youngest doctor with just one patient...the Joker. This was their last day watching doctor's at Arkham have sessions. Tomorrow they would be assigned a patient to have sessions with everyday for a week.

They would all be the patients classified as non-violent. Most of their temporary patients would be schizophrenics.

The door buzzed and everyone was silenced. Each student shuffled to the back of the room and awaited the arrival of the Dark Prince...the Joker. Instead a young woman entered. Doctor Harleen Quinzel. All the students applauded and she gave an appreciative smile.

She looked odd in her white coat being so young. It looked like a girl playing dress-up.

"Thank-you. I really just wanted to go over some guide-lines before we bring in patient 3997. We will allow questions, but after I have my session. If he speaks to you, don't react unless given permission. He likes to get a rise out of people. Don't give him the satisfaction. Also, ladies, he can be pretty flirty so why do all the men line up in front of the girls. Stagger a bit so they can see though..."

All the students shuffled around.

One student caught Harleen's eye. A girl with wavy red hair to the far right. She looked inquisitive. She looked curious. She was beautiful. The girl was straight-faced and professional, though still just two years younger than Harleen.

Harleen cleared her throat.

"Right, then. Let's bring him in..." she said into a walkie-talkie.

The door buzzed again and in walked the Joker. He had on handcuffs and anklecuffs. Two guards guided him by his arms to a chair on the opposite side of the table from Doctor Harleen.

Harleen set down at tape recorder.

"This is Doctor Harleen Quinzel. Session fifty-four with patient 3997, otherwise known as the Joker. We are joined by psychiatry students from Gotham University who are majoring in criminal psychology. How are you, Joker?" asked Harleen formally.

The Joker's eyes gazed the meds students. All wide-eyed as they saw their dream come true of a patient sitting only yards away.

"Fine," he replied still looking at the students.

Harleen glanced over her shoulder and tightened her blonde ponytail. She felt strangely threatened by the redhead. The redhead whose gaze was not terrified, but calm.

Harleen turned back to the Joker.

"Do they make you uncomfortable?" she asked kindly.

The Joker grinned.

"Vice versa, doc."

He raised his cuffed hands and pointed to a brunette girl who cowered behind a brawny boy.

"I wanna talk to her," the Joker said with a wicked glance at her.

Harleen turned around and motioned for the girl to come forward. The girl didn't want to...but she would be an idiot to turn this down.

"Who are you?" asked the Joker as she stood before him.

"I'm Ashley Navers..." she said softly.

He leaned back and stretched his long toned arms on the table, drumming his fingers.

"You look nervous. Is it the scars?" he asked tilting his head to the side.

Ashley shook her head slowly.

"Mmm... You don't want to be a criminal psychologist. You're only here to be around Mr. Hunk-a-Burnin'-Love," said the Joker pointing his hands at the boy she had been hiding behind.

Harleen looked back at the girl whose jaw dropped. Her eyes drifted to the redhead. She stood with a small smile on her lips. Her big grey eyes met Doctor Quinzel's and she hastily looked back to Ashley.

"Yes, Ashley. You have been wanting him since high school when you got dumped and he consoled you. Mr. Dreamy! She had wanted you for a while. Put her out of her misery. It's pathetic," said the Joker.

Ashley's eyes brimmed with tears and she stormed out of the room, followed by 'Mr. Hunk-a-Burnin'-Love/Mr. Dreamy.' The redhead glanced over at Ashley then looked back at the Joker.

"Now, Joker," Harleen said shifting her gaze back to him, "that wasn't very nice..."

The Joker shrugged.

"I've told you time and time again, I'm not a morning person."

"It's three in the afternoon," Harleen said with a laugh.

There was a pause and he smiled.

"Yeah, but I got up this morning."

Harleen giggled like a school-girl and the redhead exchanged glances with her fellow students.

"I'd just like to call to everyone's attention that Doctor Quinzel still uses a cassette recorder for these sessions. I don't know how she came about one, but she has one. I think she stole it from the 80s."

Doctor Quinzel laughed too hard. All the students looked bewilderedly at her. How unprofessional. It seemed that she had a little crush on the Joker.

The Joker smirked at her over reaction and let his eyes graze the crowd of students again. He arrived at a small pudgy girl.

"Hey, you!" he said pointing at her.

The portly girl pointed at herself in question.

"Yeah, well-fed chick. Step forward," he ordered.

Harleen motioned for the girl to come forward. She stepped forward with a deep breath.

The Joker leaned on the table.

"Do you eat your feelings?" he asked her.

The girl began to sniffle. He sneered at her and smacked his lips together.

"It's just a question, porky. Tell me... Are you still in love with Kermit the Frog?" he asked.

The girl wiped her eyes quickly and jutted her chin out.

"Don't you stick those chins out at me."

She choked back a sob at his rude comment.

"Why are you crying? They run out of your clothes at big and ta-"

"Enough," a firm voice said.

The Joker's eyes moved to the right. A chubby boy stepped out.

"Is this your brother? Or is he the chubby chaser?" he snickered.

Harleen was smiling to herself, encouraging the Joker. The boy folded his arms.

"You're just an a-"

"I can't be an ass. Your girlfriend already took all of it..." snickered the Joker.

The chubby boy began to storm forward.

"Terry, don't," a smooth but firm voice said.

The Joker's eyes lit up. Harleen followed his gaze to the redhead and her insides were on fire. He couldn't be interested in her. Not that girl. She was his one and only. Not that Ginger.

JOKER'S POINT OF VIEW

The redhaired girl grabbed the chubby boy's arm and he stopped in his tracks, looking at her. She shook her head.

"That's what he wants. He wants a rise out of you. Don't react," she whispered.

All I could see was the back of her red hair. It was wavy and her body was imperfect. She had a thin torso, wide hips because of her butt(which belonged on Jessica Rabbit) and long, skinny legs. It was ugly. It was just odd. Someone that short shouldn't have such long legs.

"I'm hard to ignore, Ginger," I said licking my lower lip.

The chubby boy grabbed the chubby girl by the arm and dragged her out of the room. The redhead began to fall back in line.

"Come back here, red," I requested.

She kept walking back to her spot.

"Come. Back. Here," I roared.

She ignored me.

"Hey, he asked for you," Harleen spat for me.

Ah, Harleen, my gullible psychiatrist. I gave her an appreciative nod.

(I listened to this while I wrote the rest of the chapter. Corny but good motivation: watch?v=3mC5V_jvJ9A )

The girl turned on her heel and looked at me with furrowed brows and pursed lips. I could tell that under normal circumstances she wouldn't have listened to me. She was tough.

Her big grey eyes smoldered me. Her flowing red hair seemed to be on fire with irritation. I liked it. She was a beautiful creature. Stunning. I wanted to ruin her. Not in a kinky way. I wanted to drive her insane. Just like I had with Harleen.

"Let's see if I can get a rise out of you, shortstack," I grinned wickedly.

She set her jaw and raised her brows at me, crossing her arms. Okay, the shortstack line didn't get her...

"What's your name, doll?"

Harleen used to hate it when I called her doll. Maybe this would get to her.

Nope. She remained staring at me with arms folded, jaw set and brows raised as if saying 'is that all you got?'

"Jane Truitt," she said pridefully.

I smacked my lips together and felt the jealousy radiate off of Harleen.

"Jane Truitt, anyone ever tell you that have you smoldering eyes. Irresistable. I would love to cut them out and keep them so I could look at them forever," I tried with a smile.

Harleen cleared her throat uncomfortably.

Jane smirked slightly.

"That's all you got? Empty threats?"

"It was meant to be a compliment... I thought it would make you uneasy..." I said, slight disappointment in my tone.

"Dude, you can't make Jane uneasy," laughed a handsome boy standing in the middle.

I kept my dark eyes on Jane.

"We'll see about that..."

Jane shrugged, turned on her heel and went to stand back in line. Harleen looked green with envy.

"Aw, Harleen, don't look so down. You're still my girl," I said in a consoling voice.

She shook her head, unsmiling but she blushed. I wouldn't call her out on it though. To many people were around.

My eyes slowly moved back to Jane who had her arms folded, staring at me interestedly. I winked at her and clicked my tongue. She gave me that smirk again and rolled her eyes.

"You're too good for the rest of them, Jane. You know that?" I informed her.

Her eyes grew soft. I got her.

JANE'S POINT OF VIEW

I had always felt that way but would never voice that. I couldn't. It was innappropriate so I stuck to knowing it myself. I couldn't help but look a little touched. Surprised. Proud.

"Yeah, too good for everyone else here. In fact, you should just be my psychiatrist..." he shrugged.

A dream come true. To be the psychiatrist to the most crazy man in Gotham? A criminal psychologists' dream.

"But...but, puddin'..." Harleen whispered.

All the students stared at her, mouths agape. Had she just called him "puddin'?" No we must have heard wrong. We didn't though. I could tell she liked the Joker. Too much.

"Sh...sh...sh...sh...Harleen...Don't be greedy..." he said raising a finger at her.

I looked from the back of Harleen's head over to the Joker who had his head tilted downward looking up at me expectantly.

"If I'm not mistaken, each of you get assigned a temporary patient at the end of the day. I. Want. You," he said pointing his fingers at me.

I held back a gasp.

"That's impossible, Joker... She can only have access to the non-violent patients," Harleen said quickly.

The Joker waved her off again.

"What do ya say, Jane? I can be very...very persuasive," he said darkly.

Oppurtunity of a lifetime. I didn't have a choice.

"If you can get it approved, sure," I shrugged, my arms still folded.

JOKER'S POINT OF VIEW

I leaned back again and drummed my fingers on the table. Out of my peripheral vision I saw Harleen fuming at me, but I didn't take my eyes off Jane. She was a fascinating creature. Brilliant. Beautiful. Strong. Tough. I liked that. It was amusing. I wanted to break her like a wild stallion.

"Alright, Jane... It's a date..." I smirked.

Harleen angrily gathered her papers.

"That concludes our session. Come on everyone," she grumbled rising from her seat and storming to the door.

She held it open and ushered everyone out. As Jane neared the exit last, she looked over her shoulder at me. I waved my fingers at her with both hands since they were cuffed and I couldn't raise one.

The look she gave me was a cross between thoughtful, curious and amazed. She didn't smile. She just stared at me. Harleen gave her a forceful push out of the room and glared at me before slamming the door.

Harleen Quinzel was great and all, but she was starting to irritate me. Jane Truitt seemed like the anti-Harleen. I liked that. I looked forward to seeing her...tomorrow morning.


End file.
